This weekend Brian and Nick did their third annual 24-hour stint in Columbus’ best late-night eatery, Buckeye Donuts. I was part of things last year, but decided to sit this one out because I didn’t want to take away from their test of endurance. If either would like to write about the experience(s), you know you have a home on The Black Cloud.
Last year I wrote a column for work. It’s posted below. While it varies from other writing on this site, please remember the intended audience is suburban home owners. I know, I know – I’m a sellout.
Also, immediately below are two quotes dug up on my hard drive that were recorded last year but didn’t make it into the column for work … surprisingly.
“You know when I was 15, I came to Columbus and I think I mooned this place,” said Samm after some drunk runs his face along the entire front glass.
“Scientology and sports are like the same, they’re both just cults,” said a way-too drunk patron at 6:30 a.m.
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Hours, dollars are better spent locally
Published: 4/9/2008
I’d like to introduce you to my new friends; honey-dipped, chocolate raised, devil’s food, German chocolate, powered sugar and apple fritter.
It’s true, I was feeling loopy after spending 24 hours straight in the campus-area landmark Buckeye Donuts. Besides the sugary hallucinations near the end, however, the day was hardly torture.
Tagging along with a pair of friends who started the day-long dedication last year, I learned if you had to spend an entire day anywhere, this is the place.
Unfortunately, Buckeye Donuts was our only option. No other business in the neighborhood lives by their slogan, “Open Always. Closed Never.”
Seeing a full-day cycle at a local donut shop, I learned primarily about their warm and inviting community. It’s a place were regulars not only knew each other’s name, but each other’s lives. It’s a place where customers eat lunch on our side of the counter and come back later to work the late shift.
In 24 hours we saw everyone from eccentric hipsters to the down-and-out call this place their own. Whether people had a place to go or not, they knew they could find sanctuary here.
One friend had a goal of writing about what makes a regular a regular — a difficult task for the hectic High Street atmosphere found on a Friday night, especially when it’s the first spring quarter weekend, a time when most Greek system pledges begin their initiations after waiting the mandatory two quarters.
For a regular to have the title, they first need a space. The neighborhood diner has slowly vanished since chain restaurants began clustering at highway exits in the 1950s. The substitutes rarely offer extended hours, and, even worse, little character.
Within a walk from Buckeye Donuts along High Street you’ll find Tim Horton’s, two Taco Bells, two Wendy’s, McDonald’s, Panda Express, Chipotle, Cluck-U Chicken, Pita Pit, Domino’s Pizza, Subway, W.G. Grinders, Starbucks, Jimmy John’s, Noodles and Company, Panera Bread, Papa John’s Pizza … you get the point.
These chains are identical to ones found down the street, throughout the state, on either coast, and increasingly the world. Standard menus mean everything from hamburgers to coffee will taste exactly the same regardless of whether you bought it in Columbus or Hong Kong.
With local options dwindling, soon there will be no reason to leave your hometown. This progression will save us time and money because all cultures will be the same. Everything available will conveniently be offered in your local strip mall.
Proponents of chains point to the economical stimulus, but corporate-owned chains can work as a vacuum sucking out money from the community. Local business owners have greater incentive to return profits to their community because this is where they live. Who knows where your dollars go when you buy from a chain?
Then there’s always the argument of job creation. Chains provide an abundance of low-paying, part-time service jobs, but often, these salaries do not boost an individual above the poverty line, let alone provide for a family.
The problem is hardly unique to the campus area. Central Ohio communities are facing pressures to add more McDevelopments, from Easton Two (or maybe Weston?) in Grandview Heights to a 100-acre site at the northwest gateway into Westerville.
If having a unique area to call your own is important, consumers need to patronize their remaining local businesses even if they are not as “convenient.” Elected officials need to usher in growth that’s desired by their residents, not developers.
In Westerville’s case, city council has stood their ground to ensure their city receives an acceptable gateway. Despite the interests of developers, council has stressed they want their last undeveloped entranceway into town to be a desirable location, not a continuation of the chain environment found in Polaris.
Based on council’s responses in work sessions, it’s unlikely that a preliminary development will be approved when it comes up to vote May 6.
Sure there’s anxiety in not knowing beforehand if your meal with be up to par with your expectations, but it’s a risk worth taking.
Think how exciting it is to discover that tucked-away secret only the regulars know about. You don’t even have to spend a 24-hour marathon inside, but they won’t mind if you’re crazy enough to try.
